What Do We Mean by the Conscious and Subconscious Mind?
And why aligning them builds lasting confidence.
Have you ever known exactly what you wanted to do, intended to do it, and still found yourself doing the opposite?
You promise yourself you’ll speak up in the meeting, then stay quiet. You know you’re good at your job, yet one piece of feedback sends you spiralling. You decide to rest this weekend, and by Saturday lunchtime you’re answering emails.
It’s easy to interpret this as a lack of willpower. But knowing what you want to do and being able to do it in the moment aren’t always the same thing.
Habits, emotional reactions, expectations, and the circumstances around you can all influence what happens next.
Understanding the difference between conscious thinking and what happens outside your awareness can help you meet yourself with less criticism — and find more useful ways to change.
What is the conscious mind?
Your conscious mind is the part of your mental experience you’re aware of right now. It’s reading these words, weighing up ideas, and deciding what to do next.
You use conscious, deliberate thinking for:
Logic and analysis.
Planning and problem-solving.
Critical thinking and judgement.
Deliberate decisions and goal-setting.
Directing your attention and choosing your next step.
This kind of thinking requires attention. It’s particularly useful when you’re learning something new or considering your options, but you can’t consciously think through every detail of your day.
In brain terms, this kind of deliberate thinking relies heavily on the prefrontal cortex, the area behind your forehead involved in planning, reasoning, impulse control and decision-making. It’s the part of you that can pause and choose.
It isn’t only about logic, either. You can consciously notice emotions, sensations, and memories as well as thoughts. The distinction isn’t a strict separation between reason and feeling.
What is the subconscious mind?
Subconscious is a familiar term for mental processes that operate outside your immediate awareness.
These can include:
Learned habits and familiar skills.
Automatic emotional responses.
Beliefs and expectations you don’t regularly question.
Associations shaped by past experiences.
The influence of memories you aren’t deliberately recalling.
Familiar assumptions about who you are and what you can expect from other people.
These processes can work quickly, prompting a reaction before you’ve consciously considered it.
In brain terms, these automatic responses involve deeper structures often grouped together as the limbic system. These include the amygdala, which flags what feels threatening or important, and the hippocampus, which helps form and retrieve memories. Other areas, such as the basal ganglia, help run habits. These systems work faster than the prefrontal cortex, which is why a reaction can arrive before you’ve had time to think. Neuroscientist Joseph LeDoux’s research on the amygdala, in The Emotional Brain (1996), showed that threat responses can start before conscious thought catches up.
You might reach for your phone without deciding to. You might feel tense when someone says, “Can we have a word?” Or you might agree to something before checking whether you actually want to say yes.
Past experiences can influence these responses without you deliberately remembering them. Psychologists use the term implicit memory to describe the influence of past experience without conscious recollection of the event itself.
That doesn’t mean there’s a separate mind secretly making every decision for you. It means some of what influences you happens without your active attention.
That doesn’t mean there’s a separate mind secretly making every decision for you, or that each one lives in a single spot in the brain. These areas are constantly talking to each other. It’s a helpful way of picturing the difference, not a strict dividing line. It simply means some of what influences you happens without your active attention.
Subconscious or unconscious — is there a difference?
You’ll often hear these words used interchangeably, especially in hypnotherapy and personal-development writing.
Different psychological traditions use them differently, so there isn’t one universally agreed distinction.
The APA describes “subconscious” as an everyday, imprecise term. “Unconscious” can describe processes outside awareness, but it also has a particular meaning in psychoanalytic theory. Researchers often use more specific language, such as automatic processing, implicit memory, or nonconscious processes.
In this post, I’m using “subconscious” as accessible shorthand for patterns and processes outside your immediate awareness — not as a separate compartment with its own agenda.
Does your subconscious store everything you’ve ever experienced?
You may have heard that the subconscious records everything that’s ever happened to you, even if you can’t consciously remember it.
It’s a familiar explanation, but memory doesn’t work like a complete recording of your life.
Some experiences are remembered clearly, others leave fragments, and some information isn’t retained. Remembering also involves reconstruction: we piece information together rather than replaying a perfect recording.
A more useful way to think about it is this:
Your experiences can shape memories, habits, expectations, and emotional associations — including influences you aren’t aware of in the moment.
You may not remember every occasion when you were criticised, for example, but you might recognise that feedback now leaves you bracing for rejection.
That reaction is worth understanding. It doesn’t mean you need to recover a forgotten memory or find one original event before you can move forward.
What the research tells us
Fast, automatic thinking and slower, deliberate thinking
Daniel Kahneman popularised a distinction between fast, automatic thinking and slower, more deliberate thinking in Thinking, Fast and Slow.
These are often called System 1 and System 2. They describe different kinds of processing, not two separate places in the brain, and they don’t map perfectly onto “subconscious” and “conscious.”
The relevance to confidence is straightforward: a reaction can arrive before you’ve had time to consider whether it fits the situation.
You might freeze when asked a question, then recognise afterwards that you knew the answer. Or you might agree to an extra responsibility automatically, only to realise later that you wanted to say no.
How much of everyday life is habitual?
Habit researcher Wendy Wood and her colleagues used diary studies to explore everyday behaviour. The APA reports their finding that around 43% of recorded everyday actions were habitual, often happening while participants were thinking about something else.
That doesn’t mean 43% of your mind is subconscious. It shows how often familiar situations can prompt familiar actions without much active deliberation.
Automatic responses are useful. They save us from having to make a fresh decision about every small task.
The difficulty comes when a familiar response no longer supports what we want.
Why knowing what to do doesn’t always change what you do
You may genuinely want to speak up, set a boundary, or stop checking emails at the weekend — yet still find yourself responding in the old way.
Understanding the pattern matters, but insight doesn’t automatically replace a well-practised response.
Perhaps saying yes brings immediate relief from the discomfort of disappointing someone. Perhaps checking your work again briefly reduces uncertainty. Perhaps staying quiet helps you avoid the possibility of criticism.
Those responses may feel useful in the moment, even when they have a cost later.
For example:
You want to contribute in a meeting, but worry that your idea won’t be good enough. Staying quiet reduces the immediate discomfort. Afterwards, you feel frustrated with yourself for not speaking.
The issue isn’t that you don’t care about your goal. It’s that your response in the moment is shaped by more than the goal alone.
That gives you something to work with: the situation, your expectations, the feeling, the action, and what happens afterwards.
What this can look like in everyday life
You might recognise yourself in one of these examples:
You’re respected at work, but being asked to present leaves you anticipating criticism.
You intend to rest, yet feel guilty whenever there’s something unfinished.
You understand people-pleasing intellectually, but still agree before considering what you need.
You receive positive feedback, then dismiss it because it doesn’t fit how you see yourself.
You want a closer relationship, but pull back when you feel vulnerable.
There isn’t one explanation for each pattern.
Past experiences may be relevant, but so might your current workload, relationship dynamics, financial pressure, tiredness, or a lack of support.
The aim is to understand what’s happening for you, rather than assume every difficulty has a hidden childhood cause.
How to start changing an automatic pattern
You don’t have to fight yourself into confidence. Start with something specific and manageable.
1. Notice what happens before the response
Instead of asking, “Why am I always like this?” try:
What happened just before I reacted?
What was I expecting?
What did I feel?
What did I do next?
For example:
“When my manager asked for a quick chat, I assumed I’d done something wrong. I felt tense and started reviewing everything I’d done.”
That gives you something concrete to explore.
2. Get curious rather than critical
You might ask:
“What was I hoping this response would help me avoid?”
Perhaps you wanted to avoid rejection, uncertainty, conflict, or embarrassment. Or perhaps you were tired and responding out of habit.
You don’t need to force an explanation. Curiosity is more useful than putting yourself on trial.
3. Choose one small alternative
Rather than “I need to become confident,” try:
“I’ll share one prepared point in the meeting.”
Rather than “I need to stop people-pleasing,” try:
“I’ll give myself time to check before I agree.”
A specific action gives you something to practise, rather than another standard to live up to.
4. Have an “If–Then” Plan Ready
Psychologist Peter Gollwitzer found that simple plans in the form of “if this happens, then I’ll do this” make us more likely to follow through on what we intend. It’s a kind way of giving your future self a head start.
Try it in your own words:
“If someone asks me to take on extra work, I’ll say, ‘Let me have a look at what I can fit in and get back to you.’”
Or:
“If I notice myself going quiet in a meeting, I’ll ask one question.”
That way you’re not hoping the right words will turn up when you’re put on the spot. You’ve already got them ready.
5. Use language you can genuinely work with
You don’t have to repeat “I’m completely confident” when it feels untrue.
Research has found that highly positive self-statements can make some people with low self-esteem feel worse rather than better. That doesn’t mean all affirmations are harmful; it means the wording and the person’s circumstances matter.
Try something more believable:
“I can feel nervous and still contribute.”
“I’m allowed to take time before answering.”
“One difficult moment doesn’t define my ability.”
“I’m learning to trust my judgement.”
Pair the words with small actions so you’re building experience, not just trying to persuade yourself.
6. Make room for your physical response
If you notice tension, rushing, or an urge to get away, pause where you can. Feel your feet on the floor, look around, or take a comfortable breath.
The aim isn’t to remove every uncomfortable feeling before you act. It’s to give yourself a moment to notice what’s happening and choose your next step.
And if the situation genuinely isn’t safe, or the demands are unreasonable, practical support and changes around you may matter more than trying to settle yourself.
7. Review without turning it into another test
Afterwards, ask:
What helped?
What made it harder?
What could I adjust next time?
A difficult attempt isn’t proof that change is impossible. It’s information you can use.
How I use RTT hypnotherapy to support confidence
My RTT approach is active and solution-focused.
We begin with what you’d like to feel or do differently — whether that’s speaking up, setting boundaries, responding differently to feedback, or feeling less driven by self-doubt.
Using hypnosis, guided reflection, imagery, and personalised suggestions, we work with the beliefs and expectations that may be contributing to the pattern.
These might include:
I have to get everything right to be accepted.
It’s safer to stay quiet.
I’m responsible for keeping everyone happy.
Rest means I’m not doing enough.
If I make a mistake, people will lose respect for me.
We explore experiences that feel connected to those beliefs, without assuming one memory explains everything.
The focus is on how you respond now and what you’d like to practise instead.
For example, we might work towards a more supportive perspective:
“I can contribute without being perfect.”
“I can consider other people’s needs without abandoning my own.”
“I can respond to feedback without making it a verdict on my worth.”
Your personalised recording forms part of that practice between sessions, alongside the practical actions we identify together.
The aim isn’t to make you think positively at all costs. It’s to support a more flexible response — one that gives you more choice when familiar self-doubt shows up.
The work is shaped around your goals, your circumstances, and your pace. Outcomes vary, and we’ll consider whether this approach fits your needs or whether another form of support would be more appropriate.
A closing thought
If you’ve been blaming yourself for knowing better but not always doing differently, I hope this gives you another way to understand what’s happening.
Your automatic responses aren’t a character verdict. And you don’t need to uncover every experience from your past before you can begin making changes in the present.
Understanding is a starting point. From there, you can practise speaking up, accepting support, setting boundaries, and staying on your own side when things feel uncomfortable.
You don’t have to feel completely ready before you begin.
If you’d like support putting that understanding into practice, you’re welcome to book a first call with me.
Maria x
Frequently Asked Questions
What is the difference between the conscious and unconscious mind?
The conscious mind is the part you're aware of in the moment. It reasons, plans, makes decisions and weighs things up. The unconscious mind works beneath awareness. It holds your habits, memories, automatic emotional responses and deeply held beliefs, and it runs functions like breathing and heart rate without you thinking about them. In simple terms, the conscious mind decides, and the unconscious mind carries out much of what you do.
How much of our behaviour is driven by the unconscious mind?
There isn't an exact figure, and the widely quoted "95%" isn't firmly established. What the research does show is that a large share of our everyday thoughts, feelings and actions happen automatically. Psychologists John Bargh and Tanya Chartrand explored this in their 1999 paper "The Unbearable Automaticity of Being" in American Psychologist.
Why can't I just think my way out of a pattern?
Because the pattern isn't being run by your conscious thinking. You can understand exactly why you react a certain way and still feel the same reaction the next day. The reaction is a learned association stored beneath awareness, and logic doesn't reach it. This is why insight is valuable but doesn't always lead to change on its own.
How do beliefs form in the unconscious mind?
Mostly through experience and repetition, especially in childhood. Messages from caregivers, teachers and early relationships, along with specific moments that carried strong emotion, get filed away as "this is how things are." Many core beliefs about worth, safety and capability are in place by around age seven, and they keep running quietly long after the original situation has passed.
Is the unconscious mind the same as the subconscious?
In everyday use, and in hypnotherapy, the two terms are used interchangeably. "Unconscious" is the term most often used in psychology, while "subconscious" is more common in popular conversation and in RTT. Both refer to the part of the mind that works outside your immediate awareness.
What is the critical faculty?
In hypnotherapy, the critical faculty is the part of the conscious mind that questions and filters what comes in, checking it against what you already believe. It's a useful concept rather than a clinical term. It explains why repeating a positive affirmation can feel false when it contradicts a belief you've held for years, and why the relaxed state of hypnosis can make the unconscious mind more open to new information.
How do I know if an unconscious belief is affecting me?
Common signs are patterns that repeat even though you know better, emotional reactions that feel bigger than the situation, pulling back just as things start going well, and a body that tenses before your mind has caught up. If you notice the same theme showing up in different areas of your life, there's often an underlying belief behind it.
Can unconscious beliefs be changed?
Yes. The brain keeps its ability to form new connections throughout life, so beliefs can be updated. It usually takes more deliberate, repeated work than it took to form them. RTT (Rapid Transformational Therapy) approaches this by using hypnosis to go back to the experience where a belief first formed and update it at the root. A personalised recording then reinforces the new belief. Many clients notice a shift within days of a session, with fuller change over the following month.
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I’m Maria — a Clinical RTT Hypnotherapist and Confidence Coach working online with professional women worldwide. I combine Rapid Transformational Therapy with trauma-informed coaching and nervous system regulation, going directly to the subconscious root of self-doubt, anxiety and the patterns that keep brilliant women stuck.
If something in this post resonated, a first call is a relaxed, no-obligation conversation about where you are and whether this work is the right fit.
